Hi, folks, remember me? The makeup, coffee, Castle addict? Miss me? I missed you! So much ... SO much has gone on since January that I am sure I cannot eloquently convey in this post, but let's give it the old college try. Firstly, some good news: Makeup 365 will resume some time in the nex few weeks. I know, right? All of pent up creative energy (exhaustion) needs an outlet and, let me tell ya, jewelry making and drawing ain't cutting it. Some more good news: my mind is made up and I will start the Masters of Makeup Artistry program at MUD come September. Yes, I'm doing it. It's amazing how easy a decision it was once I was told flat out by someone who has been in the industry for 25 years that school was absolutely 100% necessary to get into this field in this day and age. Ok, done and done. I took a tour little over a week ago and between my tour guide (Seneca Cancel) who so wonderfully explained everything, answered all of my silly and important questions, and the actual classes I got to look in on I was over the moon for this place. It helps that I worked with two girls who went there and highly recommended it.
So, yes, school in the fall. Something to look forward to. Back in February my mother was diagnosed with breast cancer right as I was only a few weeks into principle photography on the tv show I managed to land. If you know us personally then you know we have a relationship very akin to Rory and Loreli Gilmore. Best friends first, mother daughter second. We're freakishly close and I took her cancer the stupidest way possible: I dove into work head first, thought only about my own b.s. and ignored it. I won't go into detail, but it took some serious soul searching, a swift slap across the face in the form of guilt from my mother, and a retardedly high level of stress at work to knock me out of it. Readers digest: mom is doing wonderfully, healing nicely, waiting on word about chemo and I am no longer with the production. Allow me to dust myself off and keep moving, please. I would rather not discuss the details.
My focus lately keeps being drawn to things that inspire the artist. Recently a friend of mine sent me a link to the commencement speech that Neil Gaiman gave to the 2012 graduates at the Philadelphia School for the Arts. Is mantra of 'make good art' really stuck with me as did his story. He never went to school (not that going to school is wrong) and he broke the rules, bent the truth and had some luck in his freelance career. Have a gander at his blog and get to know him: http://journal.neilgaiman.com/2012/05/preamble-to-photograph.html I will not soon forget what he said to people who are 5 years my junior and just starting into a world that is full of so much crap and so much joy if you can find it. My new goal is to find the joy and hold it close so that during the crap I can still feel its warmth and realize that things could be so much worse. Oh, and make good art. That's what we do, isn't it? Those of us that choose this freelance life style; nomad around the country from job to job and make art? Whether we write, draw, dance, sing, or paint faces, we make art. Some of it requires further training and some of it just comes naturally. A very good friend of mine and I are on exactly the same road right now. She is going to grad school in December for journalism because passion found her and forced its way into her life, her heart and her mind. Funny thing passion, most people don't understand it. It isn't rational, it isn't stable and it definitely isn't about making yourself comfortable. Everything that passion is is about the uncomfortable. It's thinking outside of your box, moving way passed that comfort zone and finding something I think most people are afraid to seek. I turn to someone else who inspires me possibly more than I should let her:
'I think everybody fears something and then you work through it, and that’s where courage comes in. But in filmmaking specifically, you can’t lead with fear, you have to lead with courage. If you want to tell interesting, impactful stories you can’t be hampered by anyone’s theories of what filmmaking should be. So that’s what I thought would be a great way to start a film company — just create that kind of mantra for filmmaking, create interesting, impactful stories that aren’t blocked by peoples’ opinions of, ‘Oh, I can’t make it for this much money,’ or, ‘That kind of story will never fly.’ It’s just about creating amazing stories.'
Thank you, Stana Katic. About those super powers ... You already have them, chickadee.
I tweeted earlier that my heart hurts and my soul is tired today. A very dear lady in our church passed this morning one month after a diagnosis of metastatic breast cancer. She leaves behind twin 20 year old sons. Cancer ... Why is there so much of it now? Women my age, MY age, are getting it now. My heart just breaks for these boys, for Margo's best friend who is so broken by her loss and for people who have had their lives affected by cancer. My soul is just worn out. So much has happened the last two weeks between my leaving the production, my mom's surgery and recovery, other things that just don't belong on a blog ... I'm wounded, but it will heal. I'm going to go play with my dog, be with my mother, rub my cousin's baby bump and move on with this crazy adventure that life has been and will continue to be.
Check back later for some joy-filled posts about makeup, school and the dog days of summer. For now ... Make good art and sine timore.
