The farthest back I can remember is when I was 15 and encountered the first strong female TV character I can ever remember fan-girling: Kate Mulgew playing Captain Kathryn Janeway on Star Trek Voyager.
If you're laughing at the trekkie, yuck it up. I embraced it wholeheartedly. As much as I avoid things Kate does these days she was a huge part of my high school life. Kathryn Janeway was independent, strong and powerful. She was the captain. People looked up to her, respected her and cared for her. She did everything she could to make sure her crew survived and never asked for anything in return. Much as I shipped her with Chakotay she belonged alone. She was meant to be alone and stand on her own two feet. The nerdy tomboy in me needed a role model like that when I was in high school where boys made fun of me and my friends were few. For what it's worth, thank you to Kate and the writers of Star Trek for giving me a strong female to look up to for the trying teenage years.
Around 19 I met Kate and moved on with my life. The new strong woman in my life wasn't far off from Mulgew, but the age difference certainly was. Kate Hepbun is the reason I decided to go by Cate when I was 19, in community college and still trying to figure out where my life was going (at that time).
Kate wasn't afraid to be a strong woman in a man's world. She wore slack when it was uncouth for women to do so. She made sure they paid her the same as they would pay any man. She wasn't afraid to do her own stunts, her own makeup or pose nude for photos that could one day come back to incriminate her in a town that was always looking for some dirt on everyone. She always knew who she was and wasn't afraid to be Kate Hepburn. I read her autobiography at least 5 times and every one of her movies that I have the pleasure of having on my shelf has been watched dozens of times. She knew what she wanted and she went out and got it in a time when women weren't the bread winners and expected to stay home after a certain point in their life and have babies. She was never content to be what everyone else thought she should be, she was who she wanted to be. Up until I went away to Penn State she was my hero. My mind changed because of my association of her with my ex-best friend. I grew up and still hold her very high on my list of top 5 strong women I admire.
I hit limbo when I went away to school and didn't really have that one strong woman I looked up to. Not as far as popular media goes anyway. My mother and I grew extremely close, not that we weren't close before, but my being away from home made us a lot closer. I called her daily and often cried into the phone as I made my way through theatre school. The work wasn't my problem, it was mainly people and my being homesick. Some people just aren't ready to leave home. At 20-21 I wasn't ready. It took me a long time to become as independent as I am now. I hop trains to NYC as often as I can. I can't be still and creatively I don't like to be bored. At this point in my life I didn't have that. I wanted to be safe and secure and I wasn't willing to take a risk. My mother's patience and wisdom got me through my 3 years at Penn State and I am thankful everyday for that. She is still my closest friend and I go to her for advice daily. The difference is that at 25 I'm ready to take some risks and make a leap.
My inspiration in person form right now is the lovely Stana Katic. She is my modern day Kate Hepburn.
She is one of the most beautiful people I know of and I don't just mean by looks. Internally she is stunning. She is creative is many more ways than just being an actress. I see paralelles between her and I that surprise me. I thought I had ADD with my creativity when I went from sewing to jewelry to photography to dance to my horses, etc. She has this same ADD. She shoots Castle for 9 months and then goes off and shoots three movies on hiatus or does a photo shoot with her favorite photographer to do something different creatively. More importantly she knows who she is and has always known she wanted to be an actress. I envy her that. If at 4 I had known I wanted to be a makeup artist I wouldn't have wasted the last few years of my life. However, looking back, it wasn't a waste. I found other parts of myself.
Stana's energy and attitude are what I think I admire the most. She is a true professional when on set, yet has some of the quirkiest hobbies. She truly cares for her fans. I've seen her repeatedly meet fans on the street or at events and ask them their name. She makes it personal. She makes every moment of her life count and I can only hope to do the same from this moment on. I'll be honest, I began watching Castle because of Nathan Fillion and my ties to Firefly, but recently I watched some interviews with Stana and was absolutely struck by her as a person. She is well spoken, generous, dedicated to her art and enjoys life. I look forward to not only season 4 of Castle, but to her future projects. Lord knows, she wont be idle!
Here's hoping that I wont be idle either! Stay tuned.
